The $58 Wedding Dress

I am a firm believer that GOD isn't GOD if He is not the LORD over small details. And so when we started praying about our wedding, my dress was one of the many things that we asked of Him. We've always claimed that GOD is our wedding planner so ultimately, even the wedding dress would have to pass through His approval.

It was the beginning of the year that I began to sketch, build my dress board on Pinterest and follow shops such as Pronovias, Rosa Clara, Vera Wang! (Dream Big! Who wouldn't want to wear Vera Wang!) to have a clear picture of what I "really" want. As a Bride, it's very easy to change what you want so it's a good idea to set your non-negotiables. Basically, I want either Mermaid or Trumpet combination of Sheath, very short or no train at all, full sleeves, bohemin inspired, and definitely, it would not cost over $200! With these non-negotiables in mind, I began my dress hunt. As a flight attendant, I had the edge.

My first stop was nothing else but China! I have read from blogs and through word of mouth that Guangzhao is one of the best places to shop for wedding items. In fact, they have a place called Wedding St. It's a long stretch of shops, some are located in large building complexes but many more are located underground and in alley ways. Here, you can find almost everything you need for your wedding!

They say that most girls would ask bus drivers to drive slowly as they pass by the area long enough for their eyes to be dazzled by the showcase of wedding dresses- of different designs, patterns, and colors . I remember being bedazzled too! From low to high end, you can find it in the Wedding St. Prices vary according to the kind of material and design. I was fortunate enough to have two ladies (cabin crew) from that flight who guided me through the shops where they got their dresses. They are both getting married in less than 2 months and here they are, coming back to collect their dresses!

The first shop we went to was where Lady 1 got her dress. The store rep, Emily (her English name) speaks better English than the rest of the shops and that's an edge because you would want to communicate with that person for the whole duration of the dress making process! WhatsApp or Line is the main channel of communication.

Most of the hand made gowns cost above $800. In my case, they quoted $1000, 50% downpayment the same day and an assurance to have it done in 45 days. If I have $500 that day, I would have gave in but I didn't so I said I'll come back maybe next month (if I get another CAN flight).

I assisted Lady 1 to try on her dress and I saw first hand how her eyes sparkled as she step on the platform and the curtains were held open for the people to see her. It's amazing how a wedding dress can immediately transform you. In passing, I thought, maybe the dress will make you feel more beautiful in your wedding day. As I try on one dress to another, I was happy to have not opted for a ball or anything heavy.

The other lady, on the other hand, was deeply frustrated that the store did not use the right color of white. It was supposed to be pearly white but the dress turned out to be off white. You can only imagine how she argued with the manager to get her money back as she couldn't wait for another 45 days to do the changes.

Bottomline, I've observed how women put so much emphasis on their wedding dresses that they are happy to spend a big portion of their wedding budget for it! I remember countless conversations with cabin crews during down times in flight. Every time I mention that I am getting married, they will either ask about the dress or the venue! Funny that I can count on 1 hand how many have actually asked about my groom!

I also realize that the whole process of looking for your wedding dress is as much as fascinating as finding the dress itself! In fact, selecting and trying them on on a platform with a veil and a bouquet (yes, they have that too!) adds up to the whole experience.

Since I had to come back to collect the validation of my engagement ring, I went through some of the shops in Oxford St.. I have been here a couple of times before and I was pretty sure that $200 wouldn't be enough (definitely!) but out of curiosity, I tried on some. It was impressed in my heart as I collected my validation, that the wedding dress barely matters.

I began imagining myself as I walk down the aisle on June 1st,

GOD will be looking at my heart above anything. I might be wearing white to signify purity but truth is, purity is in the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7, "Man looks at the outward appearance but the LORD looks at the heart." The same Bible verse that changed my heart towards Jay was now again reminded to me.

I was uberly excited when I saw LAX on my roster since it's been almost 2yrs that I last visited this city. I remember seeing bohemian dresses along Melrose Ave. I thought it will be more appropriate for my venue. And many will agree that nothing can beat shopping in the US. My good friend Grace brought me to The Grove in Hollywood.. Grace's husband, Glenn & son, Nathan were all very patient as I tried on some. Nathan was inside the fitting room with me and he was the first to say if the dress is ok or not.. (insert all cute emojis)

This Thani dress costs $350 and as much as I want to buy it for my 2nd dress, my money was not enough.

For the ceremony, there's one dress in Macy's that caught my attention. It was 40% OFF at the price of $167.40! It was a catch! Out of all the dresses I've tried on, it's the only one that fit in my non-negotiables. Sadly, my money was not enough... I only have $150 on hand. Grace told me that she can pay for it and I can just wire the money to her when I get back to Qatar... The offer was irresistible and so I agreed.

As we were standing in line to pay for it, I did not have peace. I was hesitant to borrow money to pay for my wedding dress. Now don't get me wrong.. Grace's act of offering help was indeed remarkable and I thank her for that however when Jay and I began praying for our wedding budget, we both agreed that we will not loan any money. It's not that we can afford to have a Batanes Wedding. And we have the provision set in place to execute our vision! To be honest, we are one of those who were affected by the recession in the Middle East. It was tough being both the breadwinners in our respective families. As we prayed for wisdom, we started setting a budget believing that GOD will be the One to provide. We vowed to trust GOD especially at the beginning of our partnership.. We wanted Him to work with no limitations. And so I told Grace,"maybe there is a better way to get the dress..."

I cried the moment I entered my hotel room. I was so sad that I could not afford a $168 dress at that moment! It was very hard to get an LA flight and to drive to downtown LA from Anaheim (where our hotel is at) can be very tiring for Grace.. I felt like a little child tempted to have an ice cream only to find out that I couldn't have it.

Nevertheless, I did not lose heart. I prayed, "LORD, if it is your will for Jay & I to get married, You will certainly provide my wedding dress.."

With this hope in my heart, I began to feel peace. February roster came out and in less than 2 weeks, I am coming back to LA!

Days went by and it came closer and closer to Feb 6 where I had to fly to LA again. I couldn't keep thinking about that dress I saw in Macy's which costs $167.40. Grace said it can go very quickly since it's on bargain but I was assured that if it is meant to be mine, then it will still be there, otherwise, I will find something else. Thing is, it was already evening of Feb 5 and I still don't have provision for my dress and my pick up for LA was early morning of Feb 6!

The LORD does not delay. Jay got a message that his salary was credited while we were having dinner. Normally, he gets his pay every 10th of the month so we were not expecting it to come but it did! I was beyond excited.

Jay was generous enough to give me $700 and told me to get the best dress in LA!

The most awaited day came. This time, I didn't want Grace to drive to downtown LA because it was a weekend and she spends roughly 3hrs a day on weekdays to go to work. I decided to look around nearby stores and give her rest from driving.

There were a couple of shops we went to but I didn't find anything that I like. Grace took me to David's Bridal. I like that they will ask several questions before giving the dresses to try on. The store rep kind of filtered everything according to the theme, venue, and most specially, the budget. I told her I'll be happy to spend only $200.

As we were waiting, Grace told me the story about her wedding dress. It was her mom's. She said that during her childhood, she has always dreamt of wearing it one day and it came true. I thought to myself, "maybe it is a good idea too to do the same to my daughter.." It will be nice to pass on your wedding dress from generation to another.. Certainly, every Bride has her story to tell.

I tried on the 3 dresses that the lady brought but I didn't like any of them.. She asked me to go over my budget and try on a Vera Wang which is on sale for $1000+! I have $700 and the offer was yet again, tempting. So I said, "Cool. Let me try!"

"So this is how it feels like to wear Vera Wang", I told myself. It fits me perfectly. In fact, the lady said there would be no alterations needed. It looked like it was made for me.. However, something in the dress didn't feel right. I felt "naked." The staff brought over wears. It was a catch but I passed.

I began to feel tired and frustrated the moment we went out of David's Bridal. It was getting late and most of the shops will close early because it was a Sunday. I thought of Grace having to spend so much time with me when she could have been with her son... I was praying silently,"GOD, you have allowed me to come back here.. You provided the money I need yet I can't find the dress! I'm sure there is a purpose why you have sent me here."

Grace and I agreed that Brea Mall will be the last for the day. I was almost convinced that I ain't getting it in LA but the events turned differently. We saw the exact same dress which costed $168 in The Grove few weeks back but this time, it was on its original price of $279! I was happy to see the dress but also sad that it will cost me more. Grace told me I should have said, "Yes" to her offer previously.

Inside the dressing room, I was sending photos to some of my bridesmaids to ask for their opinion.. I wasn't half hearted to get it.. But I couldn't get over the fact that I have to pay $279 when Grace could have paid for it for only $168.

Since we honored GOD by waiting for His provision, it seemed like, we were ripped off! And to my human mind, that doesn't make sense.

I sat down and prayed about it.

I submitted everything to the LORD. I thanked Him for providing for it.. In the middle of my prayer, I suddenly felt the urge to pray for Grace. I asked if He can give me the opportunity to minister to her and encourage her. I don't know why but I began to cry for Grace inside the fitting room. I felt a deep concern about her and her family.. I felt how much she wants to have a place of her own and how much she wants to give only the best for Nathan. It reminded me of how GOD loves me so much.. His will to provide is unquestionable. He wants only the best for His child. I prayed, "LORD, if you want me to minister to Grace then you will set the platform..."

I went out of the fitting room with peace and was ready to pay for the dress. Grace told me I can use her Macy's card so I can get a 25% discount! That's a lot of savings!

We were in the counter together. The cashier asked if we wanted to donate $3 to charity because she will give us an additional 25% off! I was ecstatic! That's 50% off in total making the dress only $139.50 +tax! The cashier scanned the item and surprisingly, it registered as $58.37 after all the discounts! She called another colleague to check and they tried using the item code but it was still giving the same amount!

She called another person to check and even took a photo of it! I was almost teary. I handed the cash to Grace and walked away.. I was praising GOD! I know He is there with me as if telling me, "You see now why I made you wait, my child? This is your wedding dress."

What if I gave in to Grace's offer to pay it 2 weeks back? What if I gave in to that Vera Wang dress in bargain? What if I decided to go over my budget so I can hand it on to my daughter? What if I decided to go back to Guangzhao or London, perhaps?

Grace was trying to compute how it became $58.37 (and we ended up paying $66.37 after tax) from $279! It was unbelievable! In my heart, I know it is GOD and no human mind can explain that.. I suddenly had the platform to share about Christ. It was a testimony that Grace witnessed herself.

I know full well that this is the wedding dress that GOD would want me to wear on my wedding. It is the best dress not really because it is expensive or it is a catch but rather it was a product of faith in action. I might not be able to pass it down to my daughter (we might not have the same taste!) but it will be a story that I will share to her and to you as you have read this far.

To GOD be all the glory!